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Raising Children With Choices by Barbara Freedman-De Vito

It's undeniably difficult raising children in a changing world. You want the best for your children and you want them to fulfill their potential with each new activity that they undertake but, in a society where certain endeavors are still too often considered to be the domain of males only or of females only, it may take a bit of effort to create a maximum of opportunities for your children, whether they be girls or boys.

Every child, and for that matter, every adult, has innate aptitudes for certain things. Some kids may do better in school than others do, some excel in verbal skills, and for others their forte may be analytical skills or problem-solving. Mathematics and science come more easily to some children than to others, while some are good with their hands. Many are curious about how machines function. Some have the patience and perseverence to stick with a complex new project, and some don't. Certain children have a talent for drawing or for music. The possibilities and the individual variations are limitless.

As children grow up, what each child becomes is a combination of these innate aptitudes, exposure to a variety of topics and activities and experiences, plus the character-building lessons learned from parents, teachers, siblings, peers and others. One part of the equation, without the others, may lead nowhere. A particular child may have the potential to become a great musician but, unless that child is exposed to a variety of musical forms or has the opportunity to see and touch musical instruments and learn to play whichever one appeals to him or her, it may come to nothing. Another child might grow up to contribute great things to medical science but, unless taught basic biology and other sciences, that child will never see medicine as a possible career choice.

To allow your children to develop into the most that they can be, it's up to you to guide their education, in terms of their choices, from the variety of classes available to them at school, to their afterschool activities, public library use, the joining of local clubs, and the use of other resources which are available within your community or beyond it. You can also pass your own special skills, storehouse of knowledge, and interests on to your children.

Children are little bundles of potential. When raising your children, try to be ever conscious of this, and of the subtle sex role stereotyping that you yourself may have grown up with and how it might affect what you offer to your daughters or to your sons. As toddlers, are girls given dolls and boys given toy trucks ? Is a seven-year-old boy signed up for Little League, while a girl is offered ballet lessons ?

There's nothing wrong with little girls playing with dolls and taking dance lessons. Those activities are fine. Dolls are fun and they allow little girls to vicariously experiment with and prepare for real life social interactions. Dance lessons may reveal a future professional dancer or give your daughter the pleasure of a lifelong hobby, a great way to stay trim and fit, or a passion for ballet music. The problem arises if little girls are only exposed to traditional 'female' pursuits and interests, such as dolls and dance lessons. Starting from the youngest age, give girls the opportunity to play with toy boats and cars and trains, as well. Encourage participation in organized sports and, when old enough, give your daughters science experiment kits. Don't limit your children's potentials by restricting their activities to traditional gender-based categories.

As your daughters grow up, expose them to as many different pursuits, of all types, as you can. Let them know how important their intellectual achievements and success in school are to you. Show them your pride in their accomplishments, but without making them feel unduly pressured. With time, their natural proclivities, abilities and talents will become more apparent and they will gravitate towards certain activities, while dropping others. In order for each to find the career and the leisure time activities that are a perfect fit for them, however, they need to have a smorgasbord of things from which to choose. Sure, this is all just common sense but, amid the hustle and bustle of everyday life, it's easy to reinforce old gender roles and girl/boy stereotypes without even being consciously aware that they exist.

After a childhood rich in opportunities and choices, a young woman still may ultimately choose a profession that's always been a female-dominated one and become a nurse or a teacher, for example, and that is fine. Those can be wonderful choices and they're important jobs in our society. I'm not denigrating any one job in relation to any other job. I just feel that a choice can only truly be a choice when it is chosen from a maximum variety of possibilities. If a girl (or a boy) becomes a nurse because it is the job that most appeals to her or him, that's wonderful. If a girl grows up to be a nurse, however, because she never realized that her interest in health care might have led her to become a great heart surgeon, then that is sad and not a true choice.

Ii's not just little girls who might suffer from an unnecessarily restricted set of choices. Little boys should also have the opportunity to experiment with the widest possible range of activities and interests. If dolls can help little girls practice for motherhood or for social interactions with their peers, then why can't they help little boys learn to be more nurturing future fathers ?

Doing their share of household chores can help all chidren become more responsible and cooperative adults, but don't automatically make girls wash the dishes while boys take out the garbage. Teach both sexes that all family members share both in the labors of and the rewards of family life. Both can help with the housework, both can help care for the new baby, and both can learn to be responsible for the care of family pets. That way, everyone wins. The world could do with more men who see housework as something that everyone in the family shares equally, who become equal partners in the raising of their own children, and who develop their interpersonal skills, along with their muscles. With that in mind, don't restrict your sons' extracurricular activities to all things macho. Your son may be a budding Njinsky or Fred Astaire but he, and you, will never know it if he's never exposed to a single dance step.

As with other types of unfair limitations on individuals' aspirations or lack of opportunities because of culture, race, income level, or physical handicap, for example, gender is a poor excuse for narrowing children's choices or placing ceilings on their dreams. It's all too easy for all of us to revert to old sex roles without even thinking, as some of these are so deeply ingrained in our society, in popular culture, and in the media. With a bit of care and thought, though, we can help the next generation build a society where boys and girls, women and men are all freer to find meaning in their lives by following their personal dreams, choosing the career track that's right for them, and developing hobbies that are a perfect fit for their individual interests and abilities. To do this, all they need is plenty to choose from and the chance to try out whatever interests them.

For more tips on how to help your children reach their intellectual and creative potential, please visit our site, Children's Clothing and Gifts from Baby Bird Productions, which includes special free parenting pages, plus our blog with articles on raising happy children.

Article Source: Raising Children With Choices

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Self-Esteem: Being Your Own Cheerleader by Wendy Betterini -

Many of us believe that the only way to feel good about ourselves is to have someone else constantly reaffirm to us that we are good people. The truth is, however, that the act of simply believing in ourselves can be enough to give us the necessary confidence to accomplish the impossible, achieve greatness, and pick ourselves up when we fall. Far too often we rely on others in our lives to provide us with a best friend’s kindness, a child’s love, or a spouse’s support. If we need love and support, the first place we should look is within ourselves.

Being able to love ourselves requires a lot of practice. Overcoming years of negative reinforcement from society is tough to do. However, once you can successfully say you can love yourself, nobody can take it away from you. We must learn to be our own best friend, our own cheerleaders. We need to provide ourselves with the love, kindness, and respect we all deserve and desire. Learning to love ourselves can be an ongoing process as we occasionally fall into the trap of believing we're stupid, worthless, no good, etc.

Following are helpful ideas to use when you need inspiration to cheer yourself on.

First, when challenges arise, we must cheer or root for ourselves as we would for our loved ones if they were facing an obstacle. We wouldn’t want them to falter, so why would we allow the same to happen to ourselves? Cheering ourselves on with supportive thoughts and feelings will give us the continued strength we need to overcome many of life’s unknowns. By repeatedly telling ourselves that we are proud of who we are and what we can accomplish, we receive the encouragement needed to forge ahead in life without fear or reservation. Great things then become possible.

Another way to treat ourselves with love and kindness is to use positive self-talk, and use it often. Our minds must be constantly reinforced with the belief that we have what it takes to achieve what we desire. The resulting outcome will be an optimistic frame of mind that allows us to believe that truly anything is possible. Positive affirmations will produce the same result. Simply write down a statement, such as “I am a beautiful and lovable person.” Repeat your chosen positive affirmations daily until their truth is instilled into your consciousness. In other words, when we believe we are beautiful and lovable, we will be beautiful and lovable.

Unfortunately, being our own cheerleader also means we have to accept there will be times where we need a “pick me up.” Being there for ourselves to pick up the pieces when we’re down, or when it seems things are falling apart, is a courageous thing to do. We should not rely on others to put our lives back together for us. Rather, we must learn how to comfort ourselves and regain the positive outlook that will keep us going in the right direction. Most importantly, when feeling down, we need to take the time to reaffirm our value and our worth by the use of positive self-talk and positive affirmations.

Finally, being our own cheerleader has the distinct ability to provide us with a sense of leadership, of control over ourselves. Learning to fulfill our own needs allows us to avoid a destructive dependency on others for our feelings of worthiness. Self-worth is a belief that comes from within, and nobody can give that to us or take it away. We must remember that no matter what our circumstances are, we always deserve a pat on the back. Go ahead, give yourself the praise you deserve!

Wendy Betterini is a freelance writer who strives to motivate, uplift, and inspire you to make your dreams a reality. Visit her website, http://www.WingsForTheHeart.com for more positive thoughts to help you on your journey.

Article Source: Self-Esteem: Being Your Own Cheerleader

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Do You Remember: Retro Fashion and 70s Nostalgia by zanet

Take for example the Mini Skirt.
Mary Quant, chanteuse of the swinging 60’s Carnaby Street, is credited as the first to reveal the ultra-short miniskirt. The mini was shocking, and not since the 20’s flapper had exposing your knee caused such a stir. Respectable ladies wore skirts at knee length, and young girls were supposed to follow the respectable path, but something happened when the daring Quant shortened skirts, and the world went mod.

Designer Andre Courreges is also credited with the mini’s creation, but Quant successfully commercialized the new freedom of teenage fashion, exposing the sexually explosive 60’s to the mini. The all-too-revealing miniskirt coincided with the birth of the sexual revolution, and exposed more than legs. The birth control pill hit the market in 1960, and in 1962, feminist and future Cosmopolitan editor Helen Gurley Brown published Sex and the Single Girl, a support manual for young women who refused marriage but didn’t want to sacrifice the most primal urge. Sex was everywhere, and even more shocking than girls enjoying sex was that they were talking about it. And the miniskirt was the best advertisement for the sexual revolution.

Girls could strut their stuff, free to expose their sensuality, and men were just going to have to deal with it! No more covering up, keeping flesh under wraps because of the consequences of temptation. The miniskirt boldly stated the new confidence of a woman’s body, and her place in the feminine world. Protection and ‘providing for’ was no longer what the 60’s gal wanted. She called the shots, and in her sexy new miniskirt, she got what she wanted.

The miniskirt has remained a major staple throughout the years, as a sign of both sexuality and confidence (though we should warn you that showing thigh won’t instantly turn you into an Amazon princess. The mini might make you look sexy, but the confidence part is up to you). The 80’s returned the miniskirt back to pure unadulterated sensuality when Madonna slithered across the floor in thigh-high, black lycra miniskirts. Paired with lace tights and mesh shirts that exposed the navel, the 80’s miniskirt was unashamed and in your face. The 60’s mini was mild in comparison to the body-hugging shamelessness of 80's cotton lycra.

The mini-skirt received even more controversy when it found its way into the professional realm of the 90’s. Heather Locklear’s ‘Amanda’ on Melrose Place stirred up attention in her skirts that barely hung below the hemline of her suit jackets. Professional women were conflicted: yes, the mini-skirt made your legs look fabulous, but was this going too far? When Calista Flockhart’s title character on Ally McBeal received more attention for her skirts than for her law practice, girls had to wonder if the line had been crossed.

Hemlines rise and fall faster than the stock market—where liberated women are down on the exchange floor beside their fellow man, thank you very much. The true fashion icon of the 60’s, the mini skirt is fearless: it allows women to celebrate their sexuality, and yet defies the old fashion convention of yesteryear.

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Article Source: Do You Remember: Retro Fashion and 70s Nostalgia

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Profit From Effective Public Speaking by Stephen Pope

Developing and utilizing presentation skills can result in increased income for you. Here are a few ways that you can turn your public speaking experience into business profits.

1. Free Speeches to Promote Your Business

A lawyer might make a speech to a group of business persons, free of charge, about the advantages of incorporating their businesses. This could result in obtaining new clients. It could also cause existing clients to purchase additional services, such as incorporations, minute book work, income tax election filings, and so on.

2. Paid Seminars, Workshops and Teleclasses

You could charge admission fees to attend a seminar entitled 'How To Incorporate Yourself Without a Lawyer'. This seminar could detail the considerations and mechanics of incorporating your own private corporation.

3. Sell Information Products

The information presented during a speech or seminar could form the basis for information products such as books, courses, special reports or folios, audios, videos, DVDs, electronic books, and so forth. For example, you could write a book entitled 'How To Incorporate Yourself Without a Lawyer'.

Including such products as handouts at your seminar would increase the value for the attendees (which you could charge for). Even if you gave a free speech to a group, you could still receive back-end income from the sale of such information products.

Obviously, your public speaking skills will be especially important when producing an audio or video cassette. Your listeners and viewers will make certain judgments based on your personal appearance, poise, audience contact, use of gestures, enthusiasm, how informative the material is, and many other factors.

Your information products establish your credibility as an expert, resulting in even more business. As well, you can market those same information products through mail order, direct mail, Internet marketing, and other methods.

4. Consulting and Other Opportunities

As your reputation as an expert in your specialized field grows, you will become more in demand. Clients may seek you out for lucrative speaking engagements. You may be invited to write magazine articles, consult for large corporations, act as an expert trial witness, become a syndicated columnist, et cetera.

Therefore, whether you are a novice or an experienced public speaker, it pays to increase and utilize your public speaking skills.

J. Stephen Pope, President of Pope Consulting Inc., has been helping clients to earn maximum business profits for over twenty-five years. To learn more about effective public speaking and other profitable Work at Home Small Business Ideas, visit http://www.yenommarketinginc.com/public-speaking.html

Article Source: Profit From Effective Public Speaking

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Reading To Your Children by Brent Shields -

It's one of the hardest things to do in this day and age of hyper-active kids and super busy, multi-tasking parents... but spending good quality time with your children doesn't have to be a painful torture tactic.

One of the best, most enjoyable things you can do with your kids, is to read to them. This is a great way to connect with them and to share different parts of your life story in a natural, easy, and relaxed setting.

One of the best books, or sets of books, to start reading your kids, is the 'Little House on the Prairie' series. Beginning in the late 1800's, it tells the story of a distant, almost forgotten, time in American history. A time that many of us might not believe ever existed, if Laura Ingalls hadn't shared her life with us.

Can you imagine living without cars, without light switches, without TVs? Well, once you start reading 'Little House', you will be transported, in your imagination, back to moments that seem almost surreal. A time where kids actually played outside, and got dirt between their toes and beneath their fingernails. Where children were thrilled to get 1 or 2 holiday gifts, and enjoyed playing with them for months afterwards. A place where adults planted and grew, hunted and prepared their own foods, right from the land they were living on.

The Little House 'picture' can't be painted completely rosy, either. There are some statements and beliefs, throughout the series, that can make you cringe. You may even want to reconstruct how they are read to your kids. For example, almost all of the comments about Native Americans are derogatory. But you can not just sweep American history under a rug, or hide it, in the hopes that all the painful parts will just disappear or go away. Remembering the struggles and accomplishments is a large part of sharing and passing on your heritage to your children.

Your kids will probably be excited to share such relaxing, enjoyable quality time with you. Plus the thrill of each chapter, will provide a rich and pleasant adventure for you and them.

Whether fighting a bear in hand-to-hand combat, or travelling all night across a frozen lake, or enjoying the beauty of Jack Frost's artwork on a window pane, you are sure to find something that you and your children will love in the 'Little House' series. So make plans to start reading to your kids, and open up a whole new world of imaginative possibilities.

Brent is a regular writer for www.home-n-family.com - for more home and family related information please visit www.home-n-family.com

Article Source: Reading To Your Children

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