Jonestown Wins! Jonestown Wins! (I Just Hope Satan

Jonestown Wins! Jonestown Wins! (I Just Hope Satan Doesn’t Find Out)

August 20th, 2007

Our friend Jolly Roger at Reconstitution 2.0 has bestowed upon me specifically, and Jonestown in general the Highly Esteemed-

Pissant Provocateur Award or “The Pissy”

I’ll admit at first I was like, “Damn dog you ain’t got to be calling me a Pissant and shit,” but then after I read about the award I was like, “Damn dog you ain’t got to be calling me a Pissant and shit.”

Seriously, this is an award that I accept with a great deal of Humility. I never expected to win any awards for my blog unless it was the “Fuck off, and stop commenting on my blog you fucking smart ass son of a bitch!,” Award.

And now I have two.

How you like them apples? (What in the fuck does that even mean?)

This is from the award’s creator, Divided We Stand.

I am, of course, a hack, a flamer, a rock thrower, and it isn’t something I’m uncomfortable with. Look at what happens every time you try to take the “high road” with people that include among their operatives Karl Rove, Michelle Malkin, Maggie Gallagher, Sean “Slanthead” Hannity, Rush “Oxy-Moron” Limbaugh, and my personal favorite, Ann Cuntler. What do you get for being nice to them (and their brain-dead fans?) You get dumped on, and you walk away stinking. The hell with that. Let somebody more virtuous than me take the high road; I’m quite comfortable in the gutter.

I seriously dislike that damn over enunciating Michelle Malkin.

You’re not White! Give it Up! They’re Using You and Your Self-Loathing Parody!

I can’t understand why Jolly would choose me for such an award, but I accept nonetheless. Who knows maybe I can walk down to the “Cyber Cafe” and use my Righteous Blogging Skills to score some Saab driving “Liberal” Babe.

Here is the Revised Description of the Award courtesy of Central Insanity:

“1. The award recipients are pissants – i.e., they’re not the biggest bloggers in the ’sphere, they’re not Kos or Hewitt or Sullivan, but they make up in attitude what they lack in size/readership.

2. They are provocateurs – i.e., they provoke other people into thinking about and responding to subjects they might not otherwise think about and respond to.

3. By virtue of the first two traits, they advance the intrinsic value of a government that is closely, evenly divided between partisans, so no one party has outright control of the outcomes, recognizing that (a) divided government honors the check-and-balance intent of the founding fathers; and (b) divided government tends to work better; reference the Reagan and Clinton years versus the Carter and Bush #43 years.”

I’m not so sure about those “Reagan and Clinton Years,” but whatever.

I know a lot of people are skeptical about these “Awards/Memes,” and I concur because, let’s be honest, they’re a Pyramid Scheme set up to increase a Person’s Technorati Rank. So I visited “Divided We Stand,” and suggested to the Shopkeeper (MW) in order to make the “Award” more egalitarian what if the Creator of said Award returns the Link Favor?

In other words, if I’m going to link to your post because you came up with this “Award” then it only seems fair you link to me as well, and they, being a most gracious Host, agreed. (If you visit you will see “Jonestown” sitting pretty on their Blogroll).

Visit, tell them you accept the award, and “Give Me My Fucking Link!,” but be courteous.

Courteousness is next to Somethingness.

Now I have to pick 5 Recipients. Son of a Bitch does this Post ever end? I have work to do! (I’m using exclamation points a lot lately. If I start writing in all caps someone let me know).

Here are my choices:

1) B-man at Realitology

2) Morse at Sestakastan

3) Christopher at From the Left

4) Commander Other at Otherwhirled

5) Dancy at Dancy’s Corner

Go forth, multiply, spread the love like HPV, and don’t forget to write.

Be Pissants, and Be Proud!

Godspeed.